Wednesday, December 7, 2011

December 7, 2011

Current Weight:  153.8

Starting waist:  41 inches
Current waist:  33 inches (-8)

Starting hips:  45 inches
Current hips:  41 inches (-4)

Starting thighs:  27 inches
Current thighs:  22.5 inches (-4.5)

Starting arms:  14 inches
Current arms:  11 inches (-3)

Total inches lost:  19.5 inches!!!!!

I don't have a lot of time to post right now- A&P final in less than 48 hours but I wanted to post updated measurements since I haven't done so in quite some time.

More to come after finals ;)

Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Starting Weight: 205 Current Weight: 155 Total Weight Lost: 50 pounds! Its amazing how much easier it has been to start losing again once I stopped nursing. I was hoping that was the reason for my never ending plateau, but there was no way of knowing for sure until it was time to wean B. I cant even begin to express how glad I am that the weight has started coming off again. I was TERRIFIED that I would never get to my goal weigh and now Im 2/3 of the way there! 50 pounds down and only 25 more to go! HELL YEAH! So I thought I would post some pictures of my journey.
  Uploaded from the Photobucket iPhone App





 25 more pounds to go. Hmmmm, I wonder how long it will take...

Saturday, November 12, 2011

November 12, 2011

Current weight: 159.4!!!! I'm finally back into the 150's and Im so stinking excited!!!! I have been eating 1200 (or less) calories a day and trying to run at least 3 times a week. Unfortunately it has been difficult to get my running in as often as I'd like, but life has been quite busy lately. I am registered for the Celtic Solstice race in Baltimore on 12.17. Yup, I'm celebrating my 36th birthday with a frigid 5 miler and Im really looking forward to it. I have some friends coming out to join me on my celebratory run so it should be a blast. I'm also registered for the Iron Girl triathlon on 8.19.12. A colleague at work and friend from Florida are both "running" that one with me. (running? doing?) That is going to be so exciting! Im also planning on running the Rock N Roll Half in DC on 3.17.12 for L's birthday and doing the Tri-It triathlon in Bear, DE on 6.9.12.

Saturday, October 15, 2011

October 15, 2011

Wow- Was my last post REALLY on August 30th? Now that Im back to school (both work and college) I find that I dont have much time for posting. So... some updates:

My first half marathon was AWESOME!!! Philadelphia is a beautiful city and I am now a firm believer that the best way to see a city is to run it. I was feeling great for most of the run until about mile 11. At that point there was a slight grade to the course and I started feeling it in my legs. I struggled a little bit that last 1-2 miles, but I didnt stop and I didnt walk. My goal was to run the entire thing and

I DID!!! I ran my first half marathon in 2:41. Am I fast? Not by any means! But I did it damn it and that is all that matters! It wasnt pretty once I crossed the finish line though. It was as if my leg muscles seized up. It was horrible and wonderful all at the same time.

Two weeks later, I ran my second half- the Diva Half in Long Island. My Friend Kristy told me that I needed MORE GU!!! Yes, more Gu along the course and I should be ok... no more of that nasty muscle seizing thing I went through in Philly. Now, if you're not familiar with Gu, its some nasty stuff. Not solid, not liquid, but rather some disgusting in between consistency. She advised me to Gu it up every 3-4 miles. SO- 1 Gu before, 1 Gu at mile 4, then another at miles 7 and 10. Well, wouldnt ya know it? It worked! I finished strong and felt frickin' AMAZING when I finished!!!! (3 minutes faster than 2 weeks prior at 2:38) I could have seriously kept on running (hence my decision that I may actuallly pursue 26.2).

So, what's next? 5 miles on Saturday October 22nd, 5 more on 11/6 (maybe) and then another 5 on my birthday. I think running is the best way to start out my 37th year and Im hoping to have a bunch of folks there with me, helping me celebrate. After that, I dont have any definite plans beside training for a triathlon in the spring. (Yes, I said T-R-I-A-T-H-L-O-N)

Now- onto other things.

My weight loss journey (where this whole blog STARTED) has come to a screeching halt and Ive decided that it is time to do something about it. I am going to be on a strict 1200 calorie diet and Im going to be blogging about it weekly again. Its time to get rid of this last 30ish lbs!

So, stay tuned folks and please send me all of your weight loss and motivation mojo!

Tuesday, August 30, 2011

August 30, 2011

I just got back from a terrible run. I did a most excellent 10 miles on 8.20.11, then started having some weird calf tenderness and aching in my right knee. I decided that being ready for my half marathon was more important that my 100 days of running and took a few days off. It was so difficult to not get out there everyday and get a least a mile in, but I refrained and my body is much happier with me because of it. Ive also been battling a bit of a cold/sinus infection and Im thinking that played the biggest role in the most horrible 4ish miles Ive ever run. It felt like my first time out there! Its amazing how discouraging ONE bad run can be. I just have to keep reminding myself that I CAN do it. If I can do 10, I sure as HELL can do 13.1!

I had my first appointment with the nutritionist last week and she is having me do a more detailed food journal for 5 days. I have to fax what I have to her tomorrow and I will see her again on Thursday afternoon. Im terrified of what she is going to say. Ive already cried in front of her once, Im really hoping not to do that again. Its so very difficult to talk to someone about something that is so incredibly embarrassing like my food issues are. My break from running is also going to make me look like a liar since Ive already told her that I run every day.

Its funny, when Im running I think of all kinds of things that I want to say when I finally get behind the computer but when I actually sit down to write, I cant remember any of it. I guess that's God's way of telling me to get off of my fat ass and clean this house then get my homework done!

Friday, August 19, 2011

August 19, 2011

This post is going to be quite a bummer, prepare yourselves.

Im struggling- bad. You can only plateau for so long before becoming terribly discouraged. Its been 3 months and it seems that no matter WHAT I do, my weight just wont change. The good thing about that is if I have a few bad days, I dont gain a lot (if at all!). The bad thing is that I can bust my ass dieting and running for weeks (months actually) and get NO results. Zero. Zip. Zilch. Nada. Nyet. NOTHING. Same damn number taunting me on the scale Every. Damn. Day. Seriously, what the F#@k? I still have 35ish pounds to lose and they act like they're taking up permanent residence.

Ive tried:
1. eating more
2. eating less
3. modifying my running schedule
4. counting calories rather than WW points
5. giving up artificial sweeteners

Im about to start eating cinnamon by the spoonful and going nuts with the cayenne in our food.

I now have an appointment with a nutritionist as my next step. I know I eat more processed foods than I should, but I dont eat them in excess (most of the time anyway). I need to get back to the basics I guess. Salad and some sort of protein.

Mostly, Im frustrated. Im busting my ass and not getting results. THEN, when I get discouraged and eat like a freaking maniac I spend the rest of the day wallowing in remorse. Yeah, like right now.

So- Im going to post what I actually ate today as punishment for being such a freaking glutton.

2 scrambled eggs.
6ish garlic knots
4 slices of a NY style 12" pepperoni pizza
an entire order of crazy bread
2 slices of LC pepperoni pizza
a hershey bar with almonds
a coke
a Big Red soda

Everything else was zero calorie beverages. How freaking embarrassing. Im guessing that is approximately 66 points??? Umm, yeah... My daily allowed points right now is 29.

Im going to go change my son's stinky butt and wallow in my misery for a while. Maybe I'll manage to cry or something.

Its also day 49 and I havent run yet. For the first time in these 49 days, Ive actually contemplated just not doing it. THAT is sad. Of course, you know I will... one way or another.

Today's overall feeling? I. Suck. All I want is to have control of my food rather than my food having control of me!

Thank goodness tomorrow's a new day.

Monday, August 1, 2011

August 1, 2011

Taking the week off of dieting? Giant F.A.I.L. The scale this morning read...

168 lbs

Genius idea, V. Have a major love affair with food and think that it will actually HELP your diet. I swear I'm smart. I even have a college degree! Sometimes stupid things DO happen to smart people.

So, I'm back at it today. Well, I lied- I'm back at it TOMORROW. For some reason I had a really hard time stepping away from the food today. I'm feeling quite discouraged and its making it hard to stay on the wagon. I have walked or run every day so I haven't lost sight of my 100 day challenge. (I had to walk 2 days due to a pulled muscle in my calf that was injured while playing Wizards, Giants and Elves in one of my grad classes. Yeah... don't ask).

I did do my PR 7.25 miles on Saturday and I'm feeling good about Rock'N Roll coming up in only 48 days! At one point in time, I obsessed about whether or not I would be able to go the distance. Now all I obsess about is my weight/food. I haven't seen the damn scale go down in about 3 months now and its just leaving me feeling completely defeated. I start feeling pretty good about myself then I see a picture and it just makes me feel worse. Why the hell wont this freaking weight come off?!?!?!?! I made an appointment with my physician for Wednesday to talk about the hair loss and other myriad of things that are bothering me and I'm hoping he can refer me to a dietitian/nutritionist. I CANNOT fail at this weight loss journey! I'm doing this for my boys more than for myself. I just don't know what to do anymore. Am I really going to be resigned to eating salads for the rest of my life? Don't get me wrong, I love me some rabbit food every now and again, but I don't think I can handle it all the time. I guess that if that is what I have to do, then that is what I will do.

As I'm sure you can tell, I'm feeling quite defeated today. Weight loss is the only thing at which I have been unable to be successful. Of all of the things I have undertaken in my life, THIS one thing... this one MOST IMPORTANT thing is the one that I find myself repeatedly failing to do. Why do I obsess over food? Why is it one of the top things I think about daily? Honestly- the number one thing I think about is my kids. Number 2 is probably food.

That's just not normal.

Thursday, July 21, 2011

July 21, 2011

So, instead of taking the weekend off from my diet, I'm taking the whole damn week off. Maybe it will kick start my metabolism a little so I can start losing again! I have been weighing myself daily to make sure I don't overdo it too much and I haven't gained anything (in fact, it appears as if Ive actually LOST a pound!) so I'm not worrying about it right now. This never ending plateau is killing my spirit so I need to step away for a minute and just focus on my running before I lose my mother loving mind.

Speaking of running, this insane heat wave is really putting a damper on my running. I have been running on the treadmill and while that is great for intervals and my short runs, it sucks for my longer runs. I need to get outside for those and cant very well do that if its 100*+ outside.

Warning: Geek alert!

I have a pretty close knit group of online friends. We've been friends for over a year and a handful of us see each other pretty regularly since we live close enough. Since we only really get to talk online, it is easy to get sucked into conversations instead of doing what you need to do around the house (well, it is for me anyway!). So, even though I miss them terribly , I have taken a break from the group in order to try to get my life put together so I can stop feeling like a hamster on a wheel.

Yeah, that ^ pretty much sums it up!

While on hiatus I have:

1. Gone on a surprise vacation. Yup, it was a SURPRISE vacation. J had his dates wrong and we got lucky enough to be able to switch our reservation and leave that same day. Molly was boarded and she didn't seem to enjoy the experience. It took a couple of days of being home before she returned to herself and started eating normally again. Poor pooch.

2. Potty trained JD. Well, at least partially. He will urinate on the potty every time but bowel movements are inconsistent. Regardless, he is a potty training rock star in my eyes, especially since he's only 2!

3. Cleaned our bedroom. Yes, you heard me right... I cleaned our bedroom and it took me TWO WHOLE DAYS. I have to admit though, my mother (yeah, I asked my mommy to help and she is doing a stellar job. Wait... maybe that's because we're paying her) and I have done a kick ass job! J actually commented that we could fit a few kids in there. I'll get to that later.

4. Mostly sorted and organized all of the boys clothes according to size and season. A dear friend is about to have a baby boy so I'm going to let her go through everything, then we're going to yard sale most of the stuff.

5. I'm on day 20 of 100 days of running. Yes, I have run 20 days straight.

6. Met one of my college sorority sisters for happy hour. We haven't seen each other in 10ish years so that was pretty kick ass.

Would I say that my life is in order right now? Not quite yet, but its definitely closer than it was a few weeks ago.

Lastly- I am desperately trying to convince J that we MUST have another baby. I think I have him convinced that we should have one, now Ive just got to convince him that we need to get the ball rolling in September! I NEED another baby. Ive always wanted 3 kids and I am super excited to actually have them.

So. There ya have it y'all. My life in a nutshell. This isn't my usual type of post, but I thought I would try to remind myself of the things that I have accomplished and hope that focusing on that will keep my mind off of the fact that my body just doesn't seem to want to shed any more weight. Once Monday rolls around, I'm back on track and hoping to finally see some more results.

Sunday, July 17, 2011

July 17, 2011 Part Deux

Sunday: 1 mile
Monday: 1-2 miles
Tuesday: intervals
Wednesday: 3 miles
Thursday: intervals
Friday: 1 mile
Saturday: Long run, increasing by 1 mile every week.

This is what I am looking at for my running schedule through mid October. This week will be a trial run (no pun intended) and I will try to do some cross training with it in order to switch things up a bit and try to keep my legs fresh. I don't want to injure myself while training for my first ever half marathon. It does break the rules of 100 days of running, but I WILL be running every day and (to me) that is what is most important.

So far as my dieting goes, I took the weekend off. I didn't count points and enjoyed 3 slices of pepperoni pizza from Piazza Italia last night after my long run (which burned 736 calories according to my Nike+ app, thank you very much) and I washed it down with a regular Sprite. It was heavenly. I ate what I wanted and didn't worry about it for a single second. Of course, now I have to face the scale in the morning but Im hoping that all will be ok. And if its not? Well, back on the horse I guess....

July 17, 2011

I ran with KF (the wife of a colleague and a new running buddy) last night for my "long" run. It was just under 6 miles and it would have been OK if it werent for 2 things:

1. potty issues
2. my calves

I dont know what it is with my body choosing the absolutely WORST time to want to evacuate, but it never fails. I wouldnt have minded that much if it werent for the fact that I was running with KF. She is a MUCH faster runner than I am and I always try to step up my game when Im running with her. We ended up having to walk about 1/2 mile last night because I was afraid that I would soil myself. We had quite a laugh about it.

The issue with my calves seems pretty obvious. They're tired! Im running every day for this 100 days of running challenge while training for the half marathon and I think I need to re-evaluate a little. After talking with KF (my running guru that inspired me to do the 100 days of running) Im going to switch up the program a little. According to the website, you are supposed to run 30 minutes every day for 100 days. Ive been thinking about it and I understand the importance of the cardiovascular benefits of having a minimum of 30 minutes of running, but to me the most important part is the fact that I am getting out there and running EVERY DAY. So, Ive come to a decision. Since Im not actually emailing my information to the website for an official 100 days of running t-shirt, Im going to do a combination of shorter and longer runs. Im thinking 1 long run, 2 days of intervals, 2 three-ish milers, and 2 short (1 mile) runs every week. Am I still running every day? Yes. Am I still going to make this a lifelong habit after 100 days? Yes. Do I have to run for 30 minutes to make that happen? No. Ive got 2 half marathons coming up that I have GOT to get focused on and my legs are never "fresh". They're always tired and that makes the long run so much harder. Im hoping the change in my running schedule will make a difference.

I will be going to get blood drawn tomorrow for the Dr to check my thyroid and vitamin D. I know my vitamin D had tanked again, but Ive been taking 5,000IU daily for about 2 weeks now so hopefully that will be going up. Maybe we will find an answer as to why Im not losing anymore weight right now. Ive got 34 more pounds to go and really wanted to get it off before I actually manage to convince Jeff to have another baby. I dont see that actually happening (the 34 lbs part) since if we do it, we will need to get pregnant in Aug/Sept/Oct. Oh well... the journey may take longer than expected, but it never ends...

Friday, July 15, 2011

July 15, 2011

I just completed day 14 of 100 days of running. About 9 or 10 days ago I remember thinking, "What the hell have I gotten myself into? My body is angry and Im just plain tired." I realize that was probably just the first wall that I am going to hit in this journey, but Ive pushed through it (as I will any others) and am enjoying my runs. Im not really running far, but that isnt really the point. 2-3 miles daily, speed work 2-3 times per week and one long run weekly isnt anything to be ashamed of. Only 86 more days to go.

My first half marathon, the Rock'N Roll half marathon in Philly is in only 65 more days and the Diva half in Long Island is in 79 days. I will be increasing my long runs on the weekends soon. I havent done a long run in a while so I need to pace myself ;).

The whole point of this blog was to document my weight loss journey and hold myself accountable. I kind of fell away from writing because for a little over 2 months, I havent been able to lose any weight. Im still watching my daily points and Im (obviously) still exercising but the number on the scale wont budge. Im frustrated. Im discouraged. Im still determined to lose these last 34 pounds!

So- basic math can explain the principles of weight loss. Consume fewer calories than you burn. Simple, right? The difficulty lies with determining how much you burn. According to my Weight Watchers calculations, and assuming that 1 point is approximately 50 calories, I should be able to lose weight eating 1250 calories a day (which is what I am doing now). Add to that the fact that 30 minutes of running burns approximately another 250 calories and the weight should be coming off. So, why isnt it??? If I eat any less, I will be hungry all the time. I AM still nursing and that should be burning more calories as well. The math cant be wrong, can it?

Ive been experiencing some major hair loss and have expressed my concern to my dr. He is going to be checking my thyroid to make sure that I havent developed postpartum hypothyroidism. If I have, then that would explain not only the hair loss, but also the weight issue. I dont want anything to be wrong with me (of course), but it sure would be nice to have an explanation for why I cant lose any more weight.

So, I continue to chug along, stepping on the scale and staring at the same damn number day after day and week after week, hoping, PRAYING that the next time I get on will be the time the number changes.

Keep your fingers crossed for me.

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

July 5, 2011

Good idea: running while on vacation.
Bad idea: running on vacation after a cheeseburger, french fries, Diet Coke, Miller Lite and frozen creamsicle.

Lesson learned.

Did I go far? No.
Was I fast? No.
Was it pretty? No.
Did I do it? Yes.

And that... Well, THAT is all that matters.

100 days of running, day 4: check!

Monday, July 4, 2011

July 4, 2011

Happy Independence Day!

JD is still struggling with a fever that continues to come and go but he is a potty training SUPERSTAR! I just have to brag about how well he is doing with this adventure. He's even going to the potty all by himself now on most occasions. My baby is growing up...

Speaking of my "baby"...

After completing day 3 of 100 days of running, JD welcomed me home in his usual manner. He said to me, "Mommy, can I go run now? I need to get my running shoes!" (His running shoes alternate between his velcro, Thomas sneakers and his LeBron James tennis shoes that J bought for him- I think I need to buy the boy some real running shoes) Once he gets his running shoes on, we head out together and go for a run around the block. He is so proud of himself and I understand exactly how he feels. I feel that same pride when I finish a run (especially if it is a new distance or time record).

Today's run:
2.3 miles
13'04" pace (ouch!)

I have to admit, my body is NOT happy with this new endeavor. It is having difficulty seeing the long term benefits of this new torture to which it is being exposed. As I start out, I immediately start wondering:
* When will this be over???
* How long will it take to hit my pace?
* How the hell am I going to run in this horrid heat and humidity?
* Why are my legs screaming at my like this???
* Why cant I start out with that nice easy stride and breathing pattern? The first 2ish miles always SUCK.

Once I get 2ish miles into it, I think:
* Ahhhh, this is why I continue to do this.

Once I get over that hump, I fall into my easy, even stride... my breathing comes easily and isn't strained... I start *gasp* enjoying myself. When I first start out, I'm usually dreading the run. I'm hoping I can manage to do 2 miles without collapsing. Once I get over that hump, I'm wondering how far I can run before J starts questioning where I am and getting irritated that I'm gone too long.

Today- I never got over that hump. My body was pissed off at me the entire time (and I only ran for time today [30 minutes], not distance!). My body is seriously rebelling against this whole "100 days of running" thing. Fortunately, it doesn't realize that my mind is much more powerful than my body. Ive set a goal and I will not quit... especially after only 3 days! One day, both body and mind will be working together.

One day.

Sunday, July 3, 2011

July 3, 2011

Starting weight: 204
Today's weight: 164.4 (-39.6)

Starting Waist: 41 inches (OUCH!)
Today:35.5 inches (-5.5)
Starting Hips: 46 inches
Today: 41 inches (-5)
Starting Thighs: 27 inches
Today: 23 inches (-4)
Starting Arms: 14 inches
Today: 11.5 inches (-2.5)
Total inches lost: 17!!!!

Day 2 of 100 days of running:
Time: 48:09
Average Pace: 12'47"
Distance: 3.76 miles

My first thought today as I was getting ready to run? "Im going to need to buy more running clothes!"

Yup- that was my first thought. I only have 2-3 decent pair of running shorts/skirt and maybe 3 shirts that I like running in in this kind of weather. I only have ONE bra appropriate for running (those things are EXPENSIVE) and after 2 days of wear without washing, I think it may stand up on its own. And socks. My running socks keep disappearing. Im suspicious that they are getting thrown away since that is J's answer to what one should do with socks that cant be immediately mated.

Dear J,

Socks are not disposable.


I am also in need of:
Accessory pouch/band for my phone (Im afraid Im going to kill it with sweat as it bounces around with the boobies)

Ive been looking at sunglasses and Im thinking I may get some Maui Jim's. Now I need to decide which ones.

As usual, my writing has lost focus (if I didnt know any better, I would think I had ADD).

Now that Im conquering 100 days of running with an old-but still younger than me- friend from high school, she has me thinking about the 100 pushup challenge. Between the armpit boobies, back boobies and "feed your baby" boobies, I feel like I should have a litter to show for all of them. Perhaps these 100 pushups will get rid of all of the boobies that dont belong there? Hmmm, what to do???

Saturday, July 2, 2011

July 2, 2011

Current weight: 165

Yeah. Im still sitting at 165lbs and, to be honest, it pisses me off. I have cut my Weight Watchers points down to only 25 per day (that isnt allowing for any nursing points) and the damn scale still isnt budging. This. Blows.

So- what am I going to do about it? 100 days of running. Yup. Starting today I will run 100 consecutive days. According to, 90 consecutive days of an activity will rewire your brain to include that activity as part of your daily routine. I started this morning by running 3.41 miles in an embarrassing 41:45. According to Nike+, I burned 409 calories (6 Weight Watchers points) though.

So- here we are again. Re-starting a journey that started 6 months ago. Im taking a new path, but my goal is still the same. I will be the 130 pound mommy.

New measurements and weight to be posted tomorrow... before I head out for day 2 of 100 days of running =)

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

May 24, 2011

I havent posted in 2 months. I also havent really done much in terms of my dieting either. I hover between 165 and 168 depending on how much sodium I take in and water weight Im holding. For all intents and purposes, this is where I consider myself right now.

Starting weight : 204 (I think it was actually higher than that)
Current weight: 165
Total loss: 39 lbs

I have completed two 5k races and the Warrior Dash. I am registered for a 10k on 6/5 and the Diva half marathon in Long Island, NY on 10/2. Im feeling a little down on myself right now because I feel like Ive lost the strength and vigor that I had when I started this journey. I have made it past the halfway point and thats as far as Ive gotten. The weather has gotten me to where I have been running less as well.

I am planning on recommitting myself to my weight loss journey and really putting my nose to the grindstone with my running as well. I have so much that I want to say, but dont have the words right now. Its hard to concentrate as J is carrying to dog's food bowls all over the house and B is crawling around getting into goodness knows what.

I will attempt to get back on later tonight when I can better organize my thoughts. Pics to come as well!

Sunday, March 13, 2011

March 13, 2011

No weight loss this week. (I actually gained about 1 lb)

Major binge this weekend.

Im very disappointed in myself.

Will check in next week.

Sunday, March 6, 2011

March 6, 2011

Starting weight: 204
Today's weight: 173.8
Change: -4 lbs
Total weight loss: -30.4 lbs

Starting Waist: 41 inches (OUCH!)
Today:37.5 inches (-3.5)
Starting Hips: 46 inches
Today: 42 inches (-4)
Starting Thighs: 27 inches
Today: 24.25 inches (-2.75)
Starting Arms: 14 inches
Today: 12.25 inches (-1.75)
Total inches lost: 12!!!!

I honestly didnt think I would really make it this far, let alone get to my goal weight. Its kind of sad that I had to admit that, but it's true. Ive failed at my weight loss goals for so long that I just kind of assumed that I would do so again. I find that setting little goals along the way has helped tremendously. First, I just wanted out of the 200's, then into the 180's, then to 175.... now its all about seeing a 16 in front of my weight. Come on 160's!!!!!!!!

Im still doing c25k and Im also running with my uncle on Saturday mornings. Last Saturday, I just wanted to run one mile without walking and was TERRIFIED that I wouldnt be able to do it. I DID do it though and was very proud of myself. Uncle D wanted to run 1.5 miles this week and I suggested 1.25, thinking that I couldnt do much more than last week. Well, we ran 2 miles... And it wasnt on the track but on the airport trail- about half of which was uphill. We actually ran a total of 3 miles and walked a little more than 1. For the first time Im really starting to BELIEVE that I can do this race. Ive been trying to convince myself that I can do it and use positive thinking to help prepare myself, but I always had that nagging doubt in the back of my mind. Once I actually manage to run 3 full miles, I guess I need to start working on my time. It would be a little embarrassing if 2 heats pass me as I stumble along.

So.... Im still chugging along. Ive got 2 voices in my head as I run. Ive got Goss's voice screaming, "Katona! Get your fat ass up that hill!" and Ive got a co-workers voice saying, "This race is probably too hard for you. You really should start with something easier for your first race." Interestingly enough, they're both equally motivating.

Saturday, February 19, 2011

February 19, 2011

Wow... I didnt realize it had been so long since I had posted. I have recently returned to work and find that I have less time to keep up with this.

Last week: 181.4
This week: 177.8
Lost: -3.6 lbs!
Total lost: 26.2 lbs

Finally getting into the 170's was terribly exciting for me. It has been a long time since Ive seen these numbers. Of course, I still feel like an orca, but at least I know Im making progress. I am just over 1/3 of the way to my goal weight.

Ive been doing the c25k program and have had an injury plaguing me and my progress but I am chugging along. I have developed bursitis in my left knee but I have been doing my best to manage it with an anti-inflammatory Rx gel, ice, stretching and a brace. I will also be going to Road Runner Sports to get a gait analysis to get the proper running shoes for my gait and style of running. I just completed week 3 day 1 and boy did I feel fat after that! How is it that 3 minutes of running can feel like a marathon? Seriously... I am WAY out of shape. It was also my first experience running outdoors and I think that it really may be harder. I thought it was going to be easier than using the treadmill, but I appear to be corrected.

I also meet with a co-worker to do strength training twice a week after school. Monday's and Thursday's we get together and do strength training based on the principles in The 4-Hour Body. Glenn has given me the book to read as we are working on my strength training and it really appears to be the smart man's way to get fit. I hope that the combination of cardio and strength training really starts to show some good results. Im also hoping that I wont be useless every weekend for the rest of the school year. Im. So. Sore.

After my horrid workout yesterday (you know... the one that made me feel like a giant orca?), I was so hungry that I had a major binge when I got home. I am very disappointed in myself for eating like that. It wasnt even as if I ate every horrible thing in the house, but rather a little bit of a couple of junky things. I had macaroni and cheese, a piece of bread, some garlic and parmesan pretzel crisps, 3 (or was it 4?) chicken nuggets and (I cant believe I am going to admit this) some Bisquick. Yes, I ate freaking biscuit dough. I have this weird thing with doughs- I LOVE them. Bread dough, cookie dough, pizza dough, biscuit dough (not the kind in a can though) and even pie crusts. WTH? Who eats this crap? Ummm, THIS girl does. At least the Bisquick is only 3 points. (hanging head in shame).

I just got interrupted by my oldest son so I have now lost my train of thought. Figures, right? Hopefully I will return later with more. If not.... I promise I'll be back next week.

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

I KNEW it!

So, I put myself back on the scale this morning and here are the results:

Starting weight: 204
Today's weight: 183
This week change: -2 lbs
Total weight loss: -21 lbs

I KNEW my scale was on crack yesterday!!!!!

Ive got my mojo back...

On a side note- Ive got this pressing NEED to not just walk on the treadmill tonight but to actually do a week 2 run/walk cycle from c25k. Why do we have to do it every other day anyway? If I think I can handle it, Im going to go for it!

Monday, January 31, 2011

Monday January 31, 2011

Im not posting my weight today, Im going to weigh again tomorrow and hope that I misread the scale today.

Since I will be starting my workouts with the personal trainer this week, I wanted to take updated measurements (especially since I havent since starting. These measurements were taken this morning:

Starting Waist: 41 inches (OUCH!)
Today:39.5 inches (-1.5)
Starting Hips: 46 inches
Today: 43 inches (-3)
Starting Thighs: 27 inches
Today: 25 inches (-2)
Starting Arms: 14 inches
Today: 12.75 inches (-1.25)
Total inches lost: 7.75!!!!

Tonight I will be running w2d2 of c25k. Ive started getting to the point where I really look forward to my workouts even though I will have moments of dread. I just remind myself that it is only 30 minutes and those 30 minutes are all M.I.N.E. Ive also noticed that Im really feeling a lot better overall and actually do have more energy! I really wish I could conquer this food demon thats riding my back these days.

Ive gotten to a point that Im getting a little obsessed with my eating and food choices. I feel such tremendous guilt after many of my meals and then if the scale isnt showing progress, it just makes it worse. Ive set a goal for myself and I cannot let myself down- I MUST meet that goal. We're talking 55lbs in 5 months. If I lose 2lbs/week from here on out, I will be at about 45lbs by my goal date so I have to make up something somewhere. I cant imagine that dieting and getting 30 minutes of daily exercise and at least an hour of strength training every week wont help me make up that 10 lbs.

I really hate the way that food controls my life. Its almost as if I have no control over it or I have to have such severe control over it that its unhealthy. Well, I guess either option is unhealthy, isnt it? Ive got to get this weight off for myself and for my boys. AND- Ive got to keep it off.

Ive lost my momentum and my direction with this post. I will post again tomorrow and hopefully I will get my mojo back.

Monday, January 24, 2011

Monday January 24, 2010

Starting weight: 204
Todays weight: 185
Two weeks weight loss: -2.5 lb
Total weight loss: -19 lbs

Sorry for not posting the previous week. I had only lost 0.5lbs and I was a bit down. As much as I love vacations, it is really hard to make yourself eat well while on one!

I finally started C25K this past week!!! Im on W1D2 today and I am walking on my "off" days. I have already decided that I truly hate the treadmill. It seems so much harder than running on the ground. I feel like Im a one man elephant stampede on that damn thing, but I. Will. Not. Quit. Im hoping to see my weight loss pick up now that I will be working out daily. Keep your fingers crossed for me.

Im supposed to return to work tomorrow as long as the BOE got my paperwork from the doctor. As much as I dont want to return to work, I really need to. I will be working out with a PE teacher that is a certified physical trainer 2 days a week though. I am determined to run the Warrior Dash in May come hell or high water!

We have to leave for a playdate in an hour so I'd better get the crew ready to get out of here. If I get a chance, I will post again later. I finally found a picture of the 130 pound mommy =).

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Leave it to a shopping trip....

Ugh- leave it to a shopping trip to make me feel like a disgusting, fat pig again. I have been feeling so good about my weight loss but its amazing what 10 minutes in a dressing room will do to you!

I have to go back to work in 2 very SHORT weeks so I figured I would go spend some of the money on my gift cards getting some basic pieces to get me through work until I lose more weight. I didnt want to spend a lot of money because I dont plan on fitting into these clothes very long. By the time I was done shopping, I felt like I had been beaten with the fatty stick.

I have decided that I will not shop at JC Penney anymore. I NEVER leave their dressing room feeling even halfway decent about myself. I swear they have fat mirrors in their dressing rooms. Either I am completely delusional about how I look or the mirrors there are not becoming. I would think that EVERY dressing room would have "skinny" mirrors. Wouldnt more people be likely to buy clothes if they look good?

Store #2- NY and Company. Dressing room mirrors werent terrible and I found a couple of shirts that I liked, but I didnt like them enough to pay $36 for one when I dont plan on wearing it long.

Store #3- Sears/Lands End. I managed to leave here with 2 sweaters and 3 long sleeved shirts- one crew neck, two V-neck. I think the mirrors there are very similar to the ones I have at home and being successful finding something to wear helped to improve my mood a bit. 5 tops for $60. Not bad!

The biggest issue I notice that I am having is pants. I have the hardest time finding a pair of pants that fit me properly. I just want a pair of basic khaki pants to get me through a month or two so I have something besides black pants and jeans to wear. I think I am going to head to Old Navy and see what I can find there. I tend to have the best luck with the fit of pants at ON compared to other stores. I guess short and fat just isnt "in" these days.

Monday, January 10, 2011

Monday January 10, 2010

Starting weight: 204
Todays weight: 187.5
Last weeks weight loss: 3 lb
Total weight loss: -16.5 lbs

Good week! Im feeling pretty good and right back on track. As much as I love the holidays, Im really glad that the temptation is over. Im going to set a goal of 2.5 lbs for this week.

You know, peoples perceptions of the numbers involved in one's weight are so personal. I have a friend that was freaking out because her scale hit 150 lbs. Ummm, she was 8 months pregnant! I was SO excited to be in the 180's again today that I could just giggle. That little change in the number on the scale was a huge amount of motivation to shoot for the next big goal.... the 170's.

One of my sorority sisters posted about the Warrior Dash so it piqued my interest. I looked it up and now Im determined to participate! I found out that there are a few folks at work that are participating and I cant wait to get started. I think this is just the kind of thing that I need to give myself direction and drive for training. If I continue with Weight Watchers and start training after school with the c25k program as well as weight training, I should be able to do this. Am I anticipating that I may win? Hell no. Am I determined to finish? Hell yeah!

So, here's to the 180's, a renewed sense of motivation and being so close to: 25% of my weight loss goal (18.5 lbs) as well as 10% body weight lost (20.5 lbs)!

Monday, January 3, 2011

Monday January 3, 2010

Starting weight: 204
Todays weight: 190.5
Two weeks weight loss: 2.5 lb
Total weight loss: -13.5 lbs

Sorry I missed last week- it was a bit hectic.

13.5 lbs in 5 weeks... not too shabby! Especially considering that the last 3 weeks have been terribly difficult and I know that I havent stuck to the plan completely throughout those 3 weeks. I must confess that I ate horribly this past week and am very grateful that I have lost as opposed to gained.

Im still struggling with my control over food. I find that it has control of me more than I have control of it. Case in point: last night Jeff brought McDonald's home for dinner. No problem, I know my points for the food I eat at McD's. Unfortunately, he brought home something different because the people at the McD's he went to are douche bags. Anyway (sorry, I got a little sidetracked), it was some giant 1/3 lb angus burger or something like that. I got about 1/2 way through the burger and recognized that I was full. I even thought to myself, "Self, you're full. You shouldnt eat any more of this burger." Unfortunately, I wasnt very convincing because I ate the whole damn thing anyway. Of course, that binge was followed by extreme remorse. Then I started thinking, maybe I can work out a little bit tonight to make up for it (which I didnt do... of course). Then I started obsessing over my weight. I actually got on the scale, which I promised myself I wouldnt do until it was weigh in time (Monday mornings).

Although I am very glad to still be losing, I am a bit disappointed in my performance these past few weeks. I really need to reach down and find that inner strength that I know I have and drag it out. It may come kicking and screaming, but damn it... It will come!