Monday January 31, 2011

Im not posting my weight today, Im going to weigh again tomorrow and hope that I misread the scale today.

Since I will be starting my workouts with the personal trainer this week, I wanted to take updated measurements (especially since I havent since starting. These measurements were taken this morning:


Starting Waist: 41 inches (OUCH!)
Today:39.5 inches (-1.5)
Starting Hips: 46 inches
Today: 43 inches (-3)
Starting Thighs: 27 inches
Today: 25 inches (-2)
Starting Arms: 14 inches
Today: 12.75 inches (-1.25)
Total inches lost: 7.75!!!!

Tonight I will be running w2d2 of c25k. Ive started getting to the point where I really look forward to my workouts even though I will have moments of dread. I just remind myself that it is only 30 minutes and those 30 minutes are all M.I.N.E. Ive also noticed that Im really feeling a lot better overall and actually do have more energy! I really wish I could conquer this food demon thats riding my back these days.

Ive gotten to a point that Im getting a little obsessed with my eating and food choices. I feel such tremendous guilt after many of my meals and then if the scale isnt showing progress, it just makes it worse. Ive set a goal for myself and I cannot let myself down- I MUST meet that goal. We're talking 55lbs in 5 months. If I lose 2lbs/week from here on out, I will be at about 45lbs by my goal date so I have to make up something somewhere. I cant imagine that dieting and getting 30 minutes of daily exercise and at least an hour of strength training every week wont help me make up that 10 lbs.

I really hate the way that food controls my life. Its almost as if I have no control over it or I have to have such severe control over it that its unhealthy. Well, I guess either option is unhealthy, isnt it? Ive got to get this weight off for myself and for my boys. AND- Ive got to keep it off.

Ive lost my momentum and my direction with this post. I will post again tomorrow and hopefully I will get my mojo back.